Directed and written by Nedger Nemesis

Clocking in at 15 minutes, this pathetic camcorder 'film' has about as much going for it as a crack whore with herpes. (Ed - it is a much shorter version of the previous release READ about NOELIE)

Directed by and starring a man who calls himself Nedger Nemesis, NOELIE is nothing more than a repetitive, exhibitionist monologue about a man who sits in front of a camcorder and talks about himself, his mother and his dinner, behaving threateningly against a blow-up sex doll, pulling stupid faces and generally showing off like a 6 year old desperate for attention.

The film begins with its 'auteur' directly addressing the camera,

"My name is Noel Murphy. I used to be an altar boy. I'm very shy and sensitive. I love my mother. I love this house. I was born in this house. I was born shy…I want to get to know women. They don't want to get to know me, though. They patronise me…"

And so he rants, for the rest of the film!

Most people will find themselves switching off before this scene has finished. The film seems to be an attempt to translate the subjective style of the modern novel (i.e. 'Naked Lunch', 'Last Exit to Brooklyn'), but seeing a total wanker of a character ramble on about himself isn't good enough.

For the stream-of-consciousness format to work through cinematic expression it is necessary to understand the fundamental difference between literature and film. This dichotomy was described by Jean-Luc Godard in the 1960's: books are composed of words, films are pictorial.

Nemesis - the name this idiot of a filmmaker is hiding behind - gets it totally wrong from the start, then, as he should be looking to evoke subjectivity through images as did Jorg Buttgereit with his masterful SCHRAMM. Noelie's undisciplined attempts at surrealism are a failure, as he doesn't have the cinematic gifts - never mind the content - to lift this camcorder drivel into anything remotely interesting.

The rest of the film degenerates even further. We realise that Noel is the classical Oedipal son. Obsessed with his deceased mother, he detests his father who has found another woman. She becomes the object of Noel's aggressions, and he wishes to kill her for trying to 'replace' his mother.

As such, he hatches an alter ego called Noelie, who subsequently pulls contorted faces into the camera, talks about killing "fukkan' dykes", shags a blow-up doll and sticks the handle of a hammer into its arse hole.

The content, then, is totally vapid. But the form is even worse. Nemesis never stops ranting, as if the viewer would ever want to see a camcorder film featuring a hermit talking about himself. When he looks into the camera - as the character of Noel - he wears an expectant but fruitless look on his face as if waiting to be applauded.

Nemesis, then, is a total exhibitionist, a baby seeking attention. To have made a movie like this he must've believed - or wished, rather - that people are interested in him and the tea bag that stands in for his brain. The final result is pure ego. Making the film by himself - he directed, starred in it and seemingly made it in his own home - and featuring no other people whatsoever (others are only referred to), Nemesis seems to have crept too far up his own backside to find his way out of bad movie hell.

A message to Nedger Nemesis: put your ego away - you pathetic, infantile show-off - and do us all a favour by making a quick disappearance. There is nothing to recommend this short whatsoever - and your skills as a filmmaker don't exist.

In spite of this, I'm thankful at least that I didn't have to sit through the longer 50 minute version. 15 minutes of bullshit is more than enough.

Special Features 

None whatsoever.

Visit the website to purchase the film or find out more at: www.nedgernemesis.com

mailto:nedgernemesis.com

Matthew Sanderson